Eat your heart out Ben Bernanke!

I spent the spring of my life studying Economics, thanks to my father, who interpreted ‘I want to study either Literature or History’ as ‘I want to grow old before my time, studying Economics’.

To cut a long story short, I sat through hundreds of classes through my five years at DU, and promptly forgot it all the moment I left DU.

The only recollection I have of those miserable years is one class where the Macro professor discussed the relationship between hemlines and Dow Jones- to paraphrase, what he suggested was- in Paris the hemlines go up, and simultaneously the Dow Jones index moves up (he did say something about spurious correlation, but by then he’d lost me).

They do say the hour produces the man (or woman), and perhaps my hour has come. After all Mr Bernanke, like the immortal Charlotte Lucas, ‘my hearing was more to the purpose than yours’! Here we are thick in the midst of a global crisis, and the only person with a solution is me? Maaaan…I wonder how you apply to be the next Chairman of the Fed…should I send my CV to my pal Barack?

Shoot…I’ve misplaced his email address….if any of you good folks have it, do pass it on to me. I’ll remember to appoint you Vice Chair.